It was nice to be back to a familiar place, see a familiar face, and feel all emotions at once. I never knew how unhappy and indifferent I had been until I felt nostalgic the moment I caught site of the houses that emerge from the trees up above the mountains. It sent a signal to my brain telling me I was home. I knew the ride would still take an hour but I couldn’t wait to feel the cold air on my skin when I get off the bus.
I thought that with all the memories this place have of me, I would feel sad the moment I stepped foot on its grounds. I was surprised when I felt otherwise. I wouldn’t say I was happy, but it didn’t hurt as much as I thought it would. Yes the memories were there, haunting me wherever I went, but I didn’t remember the feelings anymore. It was just that mixed feeling of pleasure and sadness by being reminded of the past.
It’s just funny how sometimes you find yourself in a place where you were exactly a year ago, with the memories of the person you’ve been trying to run away from.
I know I’m not ready yet, but someday I’ll be able to go back to that place I call home with someone holding my hand before it gets frozen. Someone who’ll walk with me and take pictures of me inside the Christmas Village. Someone who’ll patiently wait for me as I scavenge for rare items in Harrison Night Market. Someone who’ll eat with me at my favorite local restaurants. Someone who’ll make me feel that home isn’t just a place, but can sometimes be a person. Someone who’ll make me realize that it’s him. My home. ❤